Scene One: The HouseEdit
(Knocking is heard at the door)
Porky: I'll g-g-g-g-open the door.
(Opens door) Porky: Hello?
(A woodpecker is disguised with a mustache and a coat)
Woodpecker: Hello, sir. My name is Sir Withingstone of New England. I understand that this is the most populated house in town, so I wonder if I can...
(Porky shuts the door)
Porky: Such a s-s-screwball.
(Knocking is heard at the door again)
Porky: Who could it be n-now?
(Porky opens the door, and the woodpecker gives him his coat and his mustache)
Woodpecker: Hey, Pinky!
(The woodpecker starts pecking on furniture in the dining room. Then he grabs a drink from the fridge and sits on a recliner)
Hoops: Excuse me, but what are you doing here?
Woodpecker: Well, I have no home, so I heard of your place, so I'm crashing!
Yoyo: What is your name?
Woodpecker: Woody. Woody Woodpecker!
(Woody turns on the TV)
Hamton: Oh, for Porky's sake...
(Hamton turns off the TV)
Woody: Hey! What's the big idea, Lil' Pinky!
Hamton: First, my name is Hamton J. Pig, NOT Lil' Pinky, and second, you need to fill out this regestration form in order to live here.
(Woody signs the form)
Woody: There, Hamton!
(Woody flies to his new room)
Hamton: Let's see here...
(Hamton realizes that Woody has written "You are a jerk!" and hears Woody laughing in his room)
Scene Two: The HallwayEdit
Impy: Hey Wormer!
Wormer: What is it, Impy?
Impy: There's a new guy in the house.
Wormer: I know tha--
(Plucky steps on Impy and Wormer)
(A pair of ant paramedics take Impy and Wormer away)
Plucky: Gosh, darn it! Now I have something on my-- OOH, CAKE!
(Plucky wanders into the kitchen)
Scene Three: The PoolEdit
(Woody is seen relaxing by the pool)
Woody: Ah, this is the only way to enjoy a fine day at the pool!
Foghorn: Hey, son! What, I say, what are you doing out there? No woodpeckers are allow, I say, allowed at the pool!
Woody: Ah, go lay an egg!
(Foghorn throws an egg to Woody's face)
Woody: Wow, I have only been here for one day, and I already have an enemy!
(Woody charges to Foghorn)
(Foghorn starts running)
Woody: Ah, I'll get him, next time! Right now, I'm gonna send an awesome video to the news!
Scene Four: The HospitalEdit
Impy: Wow, I never thought I would ever be in this much pain.
Plucky: Look, guys! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to step on you!
Wormer: I know! We're just trying to get better.
Plucky: So, no one's angry?
Wormer: Of course! Don't worry about anything!
Scene Five: Back at the HouseEdit
Woody: Hello, News people! I'm Woody Woodpecker! Today, I'm gonna do an awesome video!
(Woody starts pecking everywhere. Not only does he do that, but he pecks a sign on the wall that says, "Woody Woodpecker was here!")
Woody: As you can see, I have done somethign hilarious!
(Daffy falls through a hole. Soon everyone is falling through holes)
(Woody laughs) Woody: I hope you enjoy this!
(At mailbox) Woody: They're gonna laugh their heads off!
(Woody inserts the tape into the mailbox)
Newsman: And thus, puts the end to production of The Mighty B!. Next story, this little woodpecker named Woody has sent a hilarious video!
(The clip plays)
Newswoman: Well, that woodpecker's just a chuckle factory!
(The newspeople start laughing)
(Woody turns off the TV) Woody: Silly clip, wasn't it?
(Everyone is seen in bandages and casts, and on crutches and wheelchairs.)
(Porky shows Woody the house bill)
Woody: Let's see, let's see... Holes in House......$10,000.05? So?
Porky: The holes in the house is responsible of y-y-y-you.
Woody: What? Me? Dear sweet little ol' me?
Bubbles: Do you really think we would fall for that?
Foghorn: Son, you have taken things too far now! Why don't you just pack up your stuff and leave?
(Sighs) Porky: Look, let's all p-put it this way....
Everyone: GET LOST!
Woody: Fine! I know where I can go! I know when to go when I get bandaged up!
Kitty: It happened to us!
Woody: Shut it, nitlicker!
Buster: You mean nitpicker?
Woody: There they go again!
(Woody starts sobbing, as he starts packing his stuff up)
Woody: You will regret this! You ALL will regret this!
(Woody leaves. Then he comes back in)
Woody: And I'm taking this plank!
(Pirate music plays. Then Woody leaves. Plucky then enters the house with Impy and Wormer)
Plucky: Well, we're home! What happened to you guys?
Kitty: The new roommate, but he finally got lost.
(There's a short silence)
Impy: I was in a lot of pain!
Scene Six: The Living RoomEdit
Hamton: I'm glad Woody is finally gone!
Blossom: He was just a pest!
Daffy: I wonder what's on TV?
(Daffy turns on the TV)
Weatherman: Hello, everybody! This is Cold Promise bringing you tonight's weather! Tonight will be nothing but a big thunderstorm, as rain will last until the morning. Then, will be followed by nothing but sunshine.
Yoyo: Well, I hope that Woody finds himself a peaceful home by now!
(Porky imagines a flood, as Woody drowns)
Porky: We n-n-need Woody back!
Kitty: What? He caused so much damage!
Porky: Well. he might've done th-th-that, but maybe Woody couldn't find a home by now? Imagine, a poor Woody, out in the rain, wet and c-c-c-shivering!
(Everybody does nothing)
Porky: And we'll tr-tr-train him how to not peck the house!
Kitty: Woody's in trouble everyone! We need to save him!
(Everyone gets into the car, and drives off quick. Meanwhile, Woody is living in a cardboard box. Then, came the winds! Woody is blown into the water)
Woody: Help! Somebody help me!
(The car stops and everyone sees Woody)
Woody: I'm drown---
(Woody is in the water, and just as his entire body is down, Porky pulls him up.)
Porky: No pr-pr-delimna.
Scene Seven: Woody's RoomEdit
Newsman: Last night, a group of people have saved the life of this woodpecker! No one knows who has done this deed, but whoever did this, thank you. Next up, the reason why Mad parodies everything!
(The TV is turned off. Woody is seen in his room, with a cold.)
(Sneezes) Woody: Man, am I sick!
Porky: Well, you are welcome to st-st-stay, Woody. Now, I h-h-hope you know what we told you!
Woody: Yeah, yeah, do not peck anything but trees!
Porky: Good! Now get some r-r-r-r-sleep!
Woody: I like Pink-- I mean, Porky! He's silly! (laughs in a sick way)
- Noel Blanc as Porky Pig
- Joe Alaskey as Plucky Duck, Hamton J. Pig, Cold Promise
- Grey DeLisle as Kitty Katswell, Newswoman, Blossom
- Rob Paulsen as Woody Woodpecker
- James Kochalka as Impy and Wormer
- Jeff Bennett as the Newsman
- John Kassir as Buster Bunny
- Bob Holt as Hoops
- Mike Adair as Yoyo
- Jeff Bergman as Foghorn Leghorn
- Tara Strong as Bubbles
- Dee Bradley Baker as Daffy Duck